I wonder when...

I wonder when things will start to settle down a bit? I find myself a bit overwhelmed right now. Classes for another semester have just started. I wonder whose bright idea it was to start the semester on the week of Ash Wednesday? Well, I suppose it wouldn't be so bad, but it has been a full week of preaching for me. Tomorrow the week draws nearer to its end and I will just start to find time to dig deep into this weeks assignments and readings. I have managed to work ahead in a couple classes knowing the schedule for this week, but still am overwhelmed.

I found myself this morning in a conversation in the teacher's lounge with a staff member about what she gave up for Lent. I was caught off guard. I think that I am so sensitive to and of my pastoral identity now that I am working as a long term sub in the high school, that I find I try to avoid "God talk" because I don't want to be accused of well, "God talk." I know this sounds silly and feels hypocritical, and it is a weird place to be. I guess it is kind of like the reading from Matthew tonight - what God really wants from us is to pray, and fast and give in secret. That our responses to God be for and about God and not about drawing attention to ourselves. So at school I really try not to draw attention to who I am as a Christian, while all the while I pray for our school, the faculty and staff and the students who think it is ok to walk into my classroom as say, "YOU FUCKING BITCH!" Anyway, way off on a rabbit trail here. Back to the teacher's lounge conversation. She told me that she had given up chocolate and a lovely looking chocolate cake sat on the table in front of us. She looked at me and said, "What did you give up for Lent?" I must of looked like a deer in the head lights. I didn't know what to say. I was not prepared for that question. I hadn't even considered it for myself. It must have been a long enough silence because then she says to me, "Or do you take some thing on and do something good?" My reaction was, "yeah that is what I do, I do something good." WOW! How ready and prepared are you for Lent to start? Do you fast, or give something up? Do you take on a project or give or do good deeds? You see for me, Lent isn't about giving something up or doing good deeds. This kind of behavior and way of thinking shouldn't me reserved for six weeks during Lent. This is the way God wants us to act, behave, respond, pray, give and fast our whole lives not just now.

I did see a neat 40 day challenge on Facebook yesterday though and it might be something I give a try. It is taking a picture everyday that reflects the given word. Today's word(s) are Who am I? I guess the photographer can interpret the word(s) how they want in the form of a picture.

I hope that I can recover this weekend. Get caught up on school work. Pass my first Hebrew quiz. Visit my new baby niece Piper. Get some rest. I just remembered that I won't have to teach on MOnday because school is closed for President's Day! Yeah! Now I think for sure I can make it through the week!

Blessings to you this Lenten Season may you find whatever it is you are looking for.